4 Things I wish I knew in my 20s

4 Things I wish I knew in my 20s
Photo by Simon Maage / Unsplash

Would you like to turn back in time? If you do, what would you tell yourself?

Looking back to my 20s, the experiences that I would prefer not to have gone through are roughly based on 3 reasons: hesitation, going against my intuition & people around me.

Here are 4 things that I would tell myself if I go back in time.

  1. You regret about what you have NOT done: to be honest, there are a lot of stupid, disgraceful, and embarassing things I have done but they allowed me to realise my weak points and to do better next time. Instead, what I regret is not taking the opportunities that looked exciting to me. I would imagine 1000s of times of myself in that role/doing that activity, but did not participate because I was scared of failure or not being good enough and disappointing others. There are so many opportunities I must have missed that may have lead to other amazing opportunities & people. Why worry about failing? If we do, great, we can figure out what went wrong and how we can do better next time. Doing nothing produces nothing. When we are not improving, we are deteriorating.
  2. You are important than anyone else in the world: do not let others look down on you or take advantage of you. Do not laugh at "jokes" that make you feel uncomfortable. Do not smile just because you do not want to hurt others' feelings. I am apologetic to myself for not having protected myself. I want you to protect yourself from people that makes you feel any less valuable than you are. Do not meet or work for people with values against yours. Your self-esteem and self-love are THE most important things to you.
  3. You need to ignore the naysayers: with some, I did a good job of doing so. And I wish I have done so for all naysayers I have encountered in my life. For some cases, they include my family members based on their love for me & their ultimate intention for me to live my best life. But, think about this. You are the master of your life. Not others. Why should you care about what others think? As long as what you want to do feels right to you and makes you happy, just do it. Try it and it was different to your expectations, don't do it. Think simple. Visualise what would be the best version of yourself & do simple action that you can do each day that would make you get closer to your best self. The truth is, many of the naysayers try to stop you from going for your dreams because if you do, it will make them miserable for not realising theirs. Check 1. again. You will regret what you have NOT done. Think less, do more.
  4. You need to prioritise what is important to you: having said so, I do not mean that I should have ignored everyone around me, blocking myself from the world. But instead, I wish I secured 3 hours every day focusing on the areas of interest and what I want to improve in. By prioritising on gaining new knowledge & improving myself every day, I would have had more control over my own life other than the life controlling myself.